


Hold Me Close

by A_R_Nicoletti



Series: The treatment of Mr. Stark [2]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Child Abuse, Established Relationship, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Howard Stark's Bad Parenting, Hurt Tony, Hurt Tony Stark, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Insecure Tony, Night Terrors, Nightmares, OT3, Past Child Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-10
Updated: 2018-07-10
Packaged: 2019-06-08 05:32:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15236430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_R_Nicoletti/pseuds/A_R_Nicoletti
Summary: Tony was having nightmares again. Not that he wasn't always, but these were specific ones, very specific ones.





	Hold Me Close

**Author's Note:**

> Just a pre-warning, this does mention nightmares and child abuse, proceed eith caution. It's nothing that I would consider crazy graphic for the most part.

Tony was having nightmares again. Not that he wasn't always, but these were specific ones, very specific ones. Usually it was about the black hole, Afghanistan, dying, his friends dying, things exploding, Obadiah Stane's betrayal, dying, and even more dying.

But no, this was something he thought he'd forced hinself to "forget". It'd been weeks now since Tony had started dating Steve and Bucky, after the whole Glasses debacle (If you asked him if the fact he was wearing his glasses more was because of them, he may or may not deny it depending on who you are). And tentatively, they had started sharing a bed, god knows the stark towers beds were big enough for all of the avengers, made Tony's bed seem all to empty. But then, at least when Tony slept alone, _those_ nightmares didn't come.

Laying between the hunkin super soldiers seemed to trigger Tony's muscle memories, ones that were fond and terrifying at the same time. The brooklyn boys had their own fair share of nightmares, so when Tony started sharing bedspace and waking up shouting, they'd taken in in stride.

 _"We can handle you if you can handle us Tony"_ Tony smiled and relaxed in his lab chair at the memory, Steve holding him when he had broken and let out that he felt he was ruining things with his sleepless nights.

_"You shouldn't have to deal with me waking up every few hours, or just not being in bed at all, you know me, I forget everything, including actually going to bed!" Tony had cried, wrapping his arms around himself where he sat on the bed, it was just him and Steve in the room._

_"You're right tony, I do know you, and I know that you're incredible, and worth every second of every day. Buck and I have our own ugky rainbow of issues too, we know what it's like, we only ask that you accept us as we are, like we accept you"_

A few tears may have slid down Tony's face, but he would vehemently deny it.

Calloused hands rubbed into his shoulders, and he leant back and moaned, eyes closed. Buck had a knack for massages.

"What are you thinking Doll? It better be that it's bed time, and if it's not, you better rearrange it to being that it's bed time" Bucky purred, no heat behind his words.

Tony chuckled and then sighed.

"What's the time?" He knew it was late, the soldiers didn't have perfect sleep times either and tended to only sleep once it was well past midnight.

"One in the am" another voice murmured, and Tony smiled and blushed when Steve stooped to press a kiss on his cheek.

"Allllllright then, take me away boys" Tony made a dramatic flourish with his hands, reaching his arms up. Steve laughed, and Bucky immediately reached down to lift Tony up.

It had barely been a week in when Tony learnt that both the boys had this _thing_ with being able to carry him around. Occasionally, he used it to his advantage, and if it satisfied their needs to care for him? All the better.

Half an hour later, they were settled into bed, cuddled up to eachother, and one by one, they contentedly dropped off to sleep. Tony barely spared a thought towards a nightmare that was sure to come.

 _Tony did this many nights. His littke feet thumping on the floor, down the hall, down the stairs, down the other hall. He didn't stop to knock, only pushed open the door, and crept into the room. He was barely 5, and very fast was he learning the cruelties of the world, which is precisely why Jarvis only held him close when he crept into the butlers bed. Butler was never a work he used for the man anymore, father, was one he preffered._  
_His vision swirled, from cuddling uo to Jarvis, he was in front of his father in his study, it was his sixth birthday. It was his sixth birthday and his father was drunk again. And yet there he stood, back straight and shoulders stiff, staring blankly at the wall behind his spitting mad father. It was a coping mechanism that he had learnt._

_He knew what was about to happen, watching frozen as his father advanced on him, even in this dream he could feel the pain, hear his own screams, and as everything began to fade, the sound of a woman crying, and an ambulance sire. In the distance._

Tony couldn't breath, everything was loud, too loud, his heart was rushing in his ears, there was a loud continous sound and his body was burning in pain from his fathers attack. He felt hands on him, shouting, _his father,_ his mind bareky supplied in panic.

He felt frozen yet like he was throwing himself about, screaming, begging for his father to stop, screaming, screaming, screami-

He stopped and gasped in a breath and went quiet, he was freezing, doused in cold water in fact, at least, that's what tony thought. Slowly, his hearing filtered in, he could hear running water all around him, could then hear Steve and Bucky murmuring to him calmingly, then next he could feel them, holding him close between them in the shower. They were all clothed, and soaking wet. Slowly, he opened his eyes, and steve reached out cautiously and turned off the tap.

"Tony baby, are you with us now?" Steve's voice was shaky, it sounded like he was crying, and when Tony looked up, he could see the red puffiness of his boyfriends eyes.

"Yeah" his voice was scratchy, Tony cringed when he realised it'd been him that was screaming

Bucky and Steve continued to comfort him, drying him, stripping him in a way that was so calm he couldn't find it in him to be embarrassed. They hadn't seen him naked before, no one had moved to get past making out yet, not that they ever had time.

Buck grasped Tony's hands after they'd led him back to bed, dry and warm now, the supersoldiers were clinging to him, and Tony found he really didn't mind.

"Doll, do you want to tell us what happened?" Tony looked between his boyfriends, sniffling, trembling, noting that the two looked like they'd both had something ripped away from them.  
Tony had a feeling he knew what that was.

"I'm sorry" he managed, holding uo a hand when it looked like they were about to launch into an argument with him. Steve lanced his fingers through that hand, and held it close to his heart while he waited for their genius to continue.

"I-i know you were both his friends, that you respected him..." Tony trailed off.

"He hurt you baby, we don't vare about what he was like with us if he did THAT to you" Steve got out roughly.

Tony smiled weakly, lips wobbling.

"He was a good man when you knew him, so, it's more like we knew two very different men. Losing-" Tony took a deep breath, he didn't want to tell them this. But he would anyway, they deserved to know, especially if this was to continue.

"Losing the both of you slowly sent him downhill. A spiral of drinking, recklessness, I guess I know where I got it from. I was just _there,_ I was the one around when he was angry, he created me, so I guess he decided he could use me as he wanted.

It didn't start till I was 4, didn't stop till he died. I made excuses for him, endured it because I made myself believe that he had every right to do what he did. Made myself believe that he deserved an outlet because he lost you both and he couldn't find you." At this point, Bucky was looking dangerously blank, and Steve looked like he was ready to dabble in necromancy and bring Howard back just to kill him himself.

Tony steeled himself and continued.

"On the day of my 6th birthday, he nearly killed me. Jarvis and another house maid begged me to press charges, but Howard had seemed so sorry, laying it on thick, making it seem like he loved me. I fell for it, all I wanted was his love and approval.

When I turned 8, he burnt the skin off my hands, handed me a burning hot piece of metal, told me he'd never aprrove of me if I didn't hold it. So I did, I held it. That's why... That's why I can't be handed things" Tony choked up at the end there, sucking in a deep breath and curling in on himself.   
Just because he'd forced his out of his mind, didn't make it easier to deal with.

Tony found himself yanked into Bucky's arms, the man was shaking.

"I'm sorry" he gasped out, holding tony tighter. "Just let me- I'm scared if I don't hold you close, I'll do something stupid"

Tony didn't know what to say, bucky was using him as an anchor, to fight his way through his anger. Tony never felt safer and more loved.

Steve pressed a kiss onto Tony's head and pulled the both of them into his own arms. The atmosphere was tense, but Tony finally felt he could relax. Finally someone knew what he'd been holding in for so many years, and a weight he didn't even realise was there, was suddenly gone.

There would be a lot to work out, and hundreds more nights of screaming, but for now, just for now, Tony could lay in the arms of his men, and finally relax.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed reading! Stay tuned for the next part of the mini series, can you say Smut?


End file.
